Ad for starfish school in Bangkok newspaper

The term “starfish” is used by many western men in Thailand to refer to women who are completely unenthusiastic during sexual activity. This practice, in which women throw open their arms and legs, and turn their faces away from their partners while passively allowing them to finish the sexual act, provides the starfish metaphor, and the word has entered the vernacular of many western expats in Thailand.

A Thai school foundation is now under question as a possible source for this activity, leading pundits to wonder to what extent that practice is being taught there. If so, they ask, how many Thai women have graduated from starfish classes, is enrollment increasing, and is the concept being promulgated through distance learning classes all over the country?

Noi, a top earner at a well-known bar on Bangkok’s Soi Cowboy, seemed completely familiar with the starfish issue, but denied that any school organization was responsible for teaching her this behavior. “I see customer last night I starfish him because him fat too much and not have the good smell, so want him finish,” said Noi, as she held her nose for emphasis. “Other man, cheap charlie pay 1,000 baht, want him finish 15 minute, so starfish too, and talk to girlfriend on telephone so go disco when finish.”

Many male visitors to Thailand feel that their dignity is never more compromised than when a bar girl engages in a telephone conversation with another individual while having sex with them. “Sometimes I think they learn this stuff in school,” said one disgruntled bar customer. But Noi insists school has nothing to do with it. “Him think pay bar me make me want him sex, but no go school, only finish 6 grade Ubon Ratchathani. Him pay me 1,000 baht, but have German man pay 20,000 baht every month, and I talk him too much.”

Whatever the case, it appears that starfish schools, at least today, are an anomaly, and there appear to be no graduate classes there that teach women to engage in telephone conversations during sex with their partners. Thailand is land of entrepreneurs, though, and many western men have deep concerns that sexual practices long the norm among western women will migrate to the Land of Smiles.