The Good Manner: Love & Relationship Advice from WoWasis’ Pa Farang
This week’s dilemma: Failure to respect the King gets man in hot water with Thai girlfriend 

Dear Pa Farang, 

I think I’m in hot water.  The other day, while on a boat, the wind blew some baht notes out of my hand, and, to keep them from blowing further away, I stepped on a  few, before picking them up.  My Thai girlfriend got really upset, saying I had “stepped on her King.” I can’t understand why she got upset, and this has led to a few arguments.  Can you settle this? She reads English, so will read your answer, too. 

–          Confused and Bewildered 

Dear C&B, 

I think you’re due for some serious merit-making at the nearest wat (temple), my friend.  King Bhumibol Adulyadej is beloved by all Thais, and he ascended to his throne in 1946 as King Rama IX.  He was born in the United States (where his father was studying medicine at Harvard, is a jazz musician, and a generous man who has pardoned hundreds of prisoners on his birthday each year. His picture is on every baht bill. He and Queen Sirikit have promoted numerous works for the public welfare. 

One thing you’ll hear about Thais is that you should never touch someone’s head, or show them your feet, whether you’re wearing shoes or not. You essentially stepped on the King, when saving your loot. Many of us who come originally from Western countries do not understand the concept of Constitutional Monarchy, and in addition, because of the fact that the concept of royalty is either unaccepted or misunderstood, we tend to pooh-pooh traditional leaders of other countries.  This is a mistake in Thailand, and saying anything against the King, or his family, will not endear you to acquaintances, friends, or girlfriends.  Your girl is trying to straighten you out, so show The Good Manner, apologize, and watch your step from now on. 

Incidentally, the national anthem is played at 8 am and 6 pm each day at many places in Thailand, and the royal anthem is played before many theatrical productions.  Whenever you hear either, show respect to the country in which you’re a guest by standing, remaining silent, and thinking about how much you’re enjoying the affections of your girlfriend in the Land of Smiles. 

–          Pa Farang

Read Pa Farang’s other columns for more advice on relationships in Southeast Asia